Full Circle XI

We were laying on the bed facing each other and he was telling me about his daughters; his face lit up and his pride was shining through his words. He's a cop because he followed a long line of family members before him, but the job started to have real affects on him once he started his own family. He's terrified for his daughters and doesn't know how to stop the bad things from happening...not to them but just in general. The horrors he has witnessed will never leave his thoughts and the only thing worse that he can think of is those things happening to his daughters...the alcohol for a little while makes him numb and distracts the thoughts from consuming him. Working in that atmosphere makes it difficult to see any good that goes on and at times consumes you into thinking it is the norm. It took a long time for me to realize that just because I work with federal offenders doesn't mean that everyone is bad...it just means that I see it more than most so it becomes a bigger part of my life and I don't have the luxury of ignorance...nor does he. I started to tell him about Django, I don't know why, maybe it was the alcohol or that for once we were sharing a real moment and I didn't want him to feel alone in it. As the tears started to fill me eyes he leaned over to hold my face and kiss me...I instantly felt lost in my emotions...he's drunk and I'm sad...the whole fucking situation is sad...