Comfortably Numb XV

I left my manuscript for months, trying to reread it but not being able to connect with it anymore. I needed to bring it back to being mine, my truth and my words. I printed it off one afternoon and sat at my kitchen table for hours literally cutting out the lies and bridging the new gaps with the reality of what my life in NYC looked like. I have never done my writing, at least not my first drafts, on the computer it is all hand written so when I do edits I use the exact same approach. I got so caught up in having an agent that I lost sight of why I even wrote the book...to tell my truth and then live in it. When I read their version, the one they requested I write, I knew I didn't want to pass it off as my own...I didn't even want to try, I was embarrassed I let it get this far. I cut and cut and cut for hours.

By the time spring rolled around I had signed up to run the NYC marathon a third time. After running in 2015 and 2016 I swore I would never do it again and opted out in 2017 and 2018 but needing something to boost my confidence and aching to get back to the city I love I signed up to run once again, this time for Cystic Fibrosis. I laced up for the first time in over two years and took to the streets, I had a lot to think about as the miles rolled by.