A Love, A Loss, and Peace XXI

I woke to my father drinking orange juice and watching tv. I sat up straight in the chair and wished him good morning...I really didn't know if he would make it through the night, My father's state is fragile but my father is stubborn so he is having a stand off with death. I smiled and opened a yogurt for him and stood up to stretch and find a nurse or doctor.

I opened the curtain into the emergency room; they didn't have bed space for him. I recognized his doctor standing at a computer so I went over to catch up and plan what would happen next.

"Hey, Natalie. I didn't want to wake you but was hoping I would see you before I left". I must have looked stressed or confused because he stopped everything and gave me his full attention.
"Dad won't do dialysis". I was tearing up but not sure why...this wasn't new information.
"He did produce some urine last night, did he tell you?"
"No, we didn't really talk this morning. I wanted to talk to you".
"Listen, I have four colleagues that help me try and understand the anomaly that is Mac. All five of us have no idea how he is still alive, we actually don't know how he has survived the past decade. We have never seen anything like this, and now he is back to urinating. I have never seen someone almost die almost weekly and be able to just...not".
My father's health is frustrating because it makes him suffer while his will makes him live with it...even the doctors are exhausted and confused.
"So what now?"
"Well, he is passing urine so if you agree then we can send him home. He's not going to get better, this is as good as it gets, so let's at least let him be comfortable".
We had been through this so many times with my father, leaning over the edge and then leaning back in and deciding to stay.
"I'll go tell him the good news. This time I really thought he was done".
"I understand, I have been proven wrong by that man more times than I can count".

After I freshened up I made my way back to my father to let him know he won again.
"So, you finally peed". I couldn't help but smile, he is one stubborn son of a bitch. He's ready to go but it has to be on his terms.
"I sure did. When can I go home?"
"The nurse is getting the papers ready and I'll sign them".
"You're going to let me go home?"
"Absolutely. There's no real point to you staying now". I couldn't help but think he was playing a game of mental chess with me and I was curious why.
"Did you hear from the other two?" He was talking about my sister's, my father has three daughter's and I am the youngest.
"Only Patty, I have no idea about Trina". Patty and I grew up together and never had a relationship with his oldest daughter...but that didn't stop her from treating Patty and I like trash on the rare occasion we ran into her regarding our father. Trina won't come because she wants to control my father and put him in a home...there are only two things my father wants, to stay home until he passes and to be buried with his father. I don't care for or respect her agenda so I took over and put my father back in charge of his own life. Fuck her!

I was standing outside of his room when I spotted Erin coming down the hall. I exhaled and ran to him with the good news...is it good news? I can't tell anymore.

"Did he make it?" He looked crushed.
"He peed". I smiled and we both rolled our eyes and revelled in the extraordinary medical miracle that is my father.
"So, what are they going to do with him?"
"I just signed papers to send him home".
"Makes sense, are you staying?"
"I rented a car, I'm going to head to Toronto for two days and be right back. I need a mental health break and a beer".
"Let's take him home and I'll bring you to get your car. I'll get him back to his routine and take him for dinner. Then we can get together when you get back and plan for next time". It seems like there will always be a next time.