Coaches and Classes XVIII

"Please slow down, you're reading too fast".  Well fuck lady I'm super nervous and scared, but fine I'll attempt to slow it down without sounding like I can't read.  Right out of the gate and I felt pounced on although not for my writing, just for my nervous reading.  Ten pages seemed to take forever to get through and I would hesitate when I felt self conscious about certain lines regarding my efforts as a mother; forgetting of course that they had my work in front of them and could read on without me.  I placed my last page down on the table and watched the class continue to write all over their copies.  Here is the difficult part about listening to feed back on the chapters I have written, first was that I started with the third chapter because that is where I needed help clarifying and second because they have no idea about what I have already written I am ambushed with questions I am not allowed to answer...part of accepting the feedback is not giving answers...I was going to explode while having to remain silent.  By the time the third person started to talk my coach started laughing and had to stop them to explain my book and how all their issues were discussed leading up to my 'Role Modelling' chapter.  When it was all said and done we spent the last thirty minutes discussing my private life...something that was not so private anymore.  Who knew I could shock and awe a bunch of New Yorker's.

We all walked down the stairs and into the streets of the East Village, it was nice to be back in a class.  We wandered down the street and stopped for a drink before we all went our separate ways until the next class.