Therapy for Two III

She was walking more and better today, she looks strong and I am praying this is her come back. She ate a little more this morning but I am sure that had to do with me hand feeding her like she was royalty. Some days she appears like she can walk miles and is just a little sore and others she struggles to stand and pees on herself...how will I know when it's time? I never want to be so lost and selfish that I refuse to end her pain just to prolong my happiness...but I'm not happy anymore, I'm sad and feel the loss hovering over me. She caught me staring at her from the couch and did her best impression of a healthy dog by standing on her shaky legs and coming to sit in front of me, she could only lay her head on me for a few minutes before she slowly slid down and laid on my feet. Her breath is laboured and her heart is racing, I can feel them on the tops of my feet. She has two weeks left of medications left; if things don't improve for her we may have to operate...but to be honest I don't think an operation can hep her. I think I may have lost her or lost the opportunity to save her and now she exists for me...while I was going through my own struggles I had know idea she was also fighting one...how could I know, she would never interrupt my journey just to save her own life.