My New Routine V

Two days later and third place wasn't so bad.  I hugged the moms, snapped some pictures and made my way to mid court where my son and I always meet after any game.  He was in tears in and clutched onto me, not sad they came in third but upset that it was the last game with his team.  His father and step mother came over and we continued to take pictures and make small talk, I looked over and seen our son rallying one last times with his team and decided to let the cat out of the bag to his father first in the hopes that if it pissed him off that the gym was far too crowded for him to express it...I had mastered the art of dealing with my ex-husband and he knew it.  He tended to over react when it came to our son, but maybe that's just my opinion.  I have had the years to come to terms with living away from my child but he never had that and I worry about how this will affect him.  He came to Canada alone several years ago and our child is his only family, I try to be sensitive towards that but never at the expense of our son.

I grabbed my son after the picture session and led him to the bleachers I hoped this would be a successful hail mary to save his dream of playing football because with all of the politics around it he was starting to hate the idea of giving it even more years of his life.  I explained that I had a scout and that he would be given an opportunity to let dozens of schools witness his skills at a camp for a division one school in Montreal.   I took a deep breath knowing that I am guilty of wanting him to follow his dream, but also realizing that football is our thing and I wasn't ready to let it go...I sat there scared to breathe but trying to look confident.  In the end it is always his choice but I couldn't help but try and will it into the direction I want.  My son is strong and if he wants it then he will get it and if he does't then there is nothing I can do to convince him, he's not stubborn he's decisive.  I could see it in his eyes when it finally sunk in what I told him and the significance it held for his future, he was happy and I finally let out the air I had been holding.  "If nothing else it will give you an unbiased look from coaches who have never seen you, and hopefully no politics now that we have a scout".  He was glowing and not just from the game he finished, he was excited.  We both knew what this meant though...this would tell us if he had any chance to move up or if it was time to retire the cleats...