My New Routine XII

Ten minutes into the flight and I'm ready to jump, sometimes I'm amazed at how well children can be behaved when their parents are complete morons.  I opened my journal and did a written blog for the day. Writing has become my best and favourite form of therapy, somehow the assistance of paper or a computer makes the darkness feel like a story that I am telling and not living...it's empowering and has become fun.  Through friends I have met along my journey I am being nurtured into fighting for the life I want and surrounding myself with people who care about who I am and love to watch me flourish.  The blonde from the plane that encouraged me to blog is now profiling me and my blog in the magazine she the Editor of and it's another piece in building my puzzle.  Without the last year and my transformations I wouldn't even know what to write about and now I'm curious of where the story will go and what will it look like...life is only over at the end so what else is there?  I think the best thing I ever did for myself was open my eyes and the part of my mind that I wanted to remain locked and just let everything flow into it.  It's not easy to leave the comfort of a perfect life but it's much more difficult to think I had it all figured out at 35 years old.  I feel like a student again and it allows me to move freely and explore a world I always hoped existed and now experience every time I touch down in NYC.  I call it my secret life, but it's not a secret...I'm open about it but try not to sing about it on roof tops but others may choose to not acknowledge it, in the same way I choose not to acknowledge every aspect of my friends lives.  Besides I have no interest in hearing about the sex lives of my friends...well not the married ones anyway.

The attendant came around with drinks and I was starting to hate the teenager behind me who felt the need to adjust his legs and kick my seat every few minutes.  I decided on coffee...with Baileys'.  Two hours left to go, a few screaming kids, turbulence and alcohol....ahhh